put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize