just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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