i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
