it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
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