At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize