i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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