Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
