on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
