Say something about gay babies.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
