Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
