All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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