So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize