Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
