He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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