awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
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We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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