If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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