There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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