if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
