I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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