the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
