i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
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