everyone is single if you try hard enough
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize
