There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
