Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize
