i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize