Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
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