with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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