Me too!
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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