Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
tell me about the fingering
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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