As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize