His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize