And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
