She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
