she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
