so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize