is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
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mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I want her autograph on my taint
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
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I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
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