Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
