There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
