i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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