if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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