you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
