You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
