I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Randomize
