If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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