I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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