Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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