was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize