just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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