i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
How naked do you want me to be?
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
