google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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