Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
